You know you want to read it

Last week, I blogged about this strange story out of Iowa about a man who is charged with kidnapping his wife who he also tried to force into sexual slavery under the guise of giving her a "marriage contract."

The Smoking Gun, naturally, got the court documents and offers the full contract on its site. Our housegirl read it aloud to us last week. We all laughed and groaned. It reads kind of like a Master/slave contract - if both partners were painfully anally earnest about negotiating an over-ritualized, fanatically micro-managed sex life that would never work in real life but which plays well on the Internet, where anyone apparently will believe anything. Did Frey first find his inspiration on an SM site? One wonders. It wouldn't surprise me too much, in fact, to discover he plagiarized much of it from some dominant wanker who is possessed of a thousand pretentions yet not a single clue.

If he HAD a clue, he would know that mutual consent is the difference between good, old-fashioned, wholesome perversion and what now amounts to criminal behavior. (And by the way, any of you out there who are trying to impose illegal sex contracts or otherwise bully your partners into nonconsensual sex of any kind, keep in mind that one day you too might appear on The Smoking Gun, mug-shot and all.)

Anyway, here's the teaser from The Smoking Gun:

Sicko Marriage Contract One For The Ages

This country, as you know, is filled with the deranged. And then there's Travis Frey, a 33-year-old Iowa man who is facing charges that he tried to kidnap his own wife (not to mention a separate child pornography rap). Frey, prosecutors contend, apparently is a rather demanding guy. In fact, he actually drew up a bizarre four-page marriage document--a "Contract of Wifely Expectations"--that sought to establish guidelines for his spouse in terms of hygiene, clothing, and sexual activities. In return for fulfilling certain requirements, Frey (pictured right) offered "Good Behavior Days," or GBDs. Each GBD, Frey wrote, could be redeemed by his wife to "get out of doing the things" he requested daily. A copy of the proposed contract, which Frey's wife never signed and later provided to cops, can be found below. While we normally point out the highlights of most documents, there are so many in this demented, and very graphic, contract, we really can't do it justice. So set aside ten minutes--and prepare to be repulsed. (4 pages)....

Read the Contract

(Thanks to Doug for reminding me about this.)