Since I can't get out into the garden today, seems like a perfect time to reflect on the things of nature -- especially their sex habits.

Was fascinated recently to find a couple of studies on the sexual behaviors of flowers. Those pretty little sex organs we take for granted are filled with mysteries and intricate systems for spreading their pollen far and wide. As these mysteries are revealed, they suggest sexual behaviors that seem nearly human. How do plants achieve these coy mechanisms, without brains? And, by the way, wouldn't it be a blast if human sex organs were as versatile in their courtship?

For example, the orchid apparently has perfected a technique that mimics female wasps -- fooling males into mating with them. Scientists weren't sure why they did this but now it seems there is an evolutionary purpose: by drawing male wasps to mate with them (instead of female wasps), the flowers get a larger pool of wasps to carry their pollen to other orchids.

Sexy orchids do more than embarrass wasps: study

Orchids that mimic female wasps may not only waste the time of the male wasps they lure into spreading their pollen -- they also seduce them into wasting valuable sperm, Australian researchers reported on Wednesday.

And the flowers benefit twice -- getting help in their own reproduction, and perhaps indirectly producing more male pollinators in the process.

Some of the most exotic orchids are known to have evolved their convoluted shapes to attract insects, who unwittingly collect and transfer pollen as they try to mate with the flowers.

Meanwhile, have you ever wondered why flowers have long stems that make them wave so freely in the slightest breeze? Me neither. But scientists decided to look into the matter and discovered that it is yet another sexual ploy to attract potential pollinators. While humans may worry about whether size matters, in the world of waving flowers it's all about the wobble.

Flowers "wave" at insects to get their attention, scientists have discovered.

This acts as a powerful signal to passing pollinators, allowing the plant to attract more insects than less mobile flowers growing atop short, thick stems.

"We found wavy flowers are more visible to insects, and thus attract more pollinators and set more seeds," said John Warren.

But flowers ultimately face an evolutionary trade-off, he believes.

"Short, fat-stalked flowers don't wobble enough and are less attractive to pollinators; yet very wobbly flowers are just too wobbly for the insects to handle, as the insects cannot land on them.

"Only flowers that wobble the right amount are successful in setting seeds."

I think people forget, when surrounded by nature, that what really surrounds them is a non-stop orgy of animal and plant lust. Every living thing we see about us diligently goes about the business of getting fucked again and again and again. No wonder I love spending time in my garden.

Here's a youtube view of some lavendar seducing bees:

May 13, 2008 in Pleasures of the Garden, Sexual Science and Medicine | Permalink

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