Gloria's Oversexed Mind

Coming soon...New Fur Baby!

Though we'd ruled out the idea of adding another puppy to our menagerie this year, my rescue friend's sales job on a chinese crested of her acquaintance (shown here a couple of days ago) pushed us to rehash and reconsider and finally realize that, well, maybe we should. It's been almost a year and a half since a dreadful spate of traumatic pet deaths here (we lost two dogs to old age, and a young cat to cancer), and we're finally ready to go through it all again. Yeah. We're also all too grimly aware of the devastating effects of the economy: shelters are overflowing with pets whose owners couldn't afford to keep them, and euthanizing dogs and cats at a nauseating rate. So once we realized we were ready to adopt, we figured we should just go ahead and do it NOW, when the need is so great.

Here is the munchkin we are going to see this weekend. Gotta drive to another state for her, and this rescue fee is super-high, but if we hit it off, it'll all be worth it. She's a toy poodle who lucked out when her pregnant mom was taken in by a rescue lady. Happily, she has never had to suffer, she just needs her forever home -- and if all goes well, she'll get one this weekend.

I can hardly wait to meet her!

Facebook Rebuild

No word from FB, so I've gone ahead and created a new page. No sexy photos this time, and much of the thrill is gone (was having so much fun there), but perhaps I'll re-energize in 2010. If you'd like to re-friend me, please click here. If you see a cup of evil, it's me.

New puppy: should we or shouldn't we?

A local dog rescue friend thinks we should add this little boy to our crew. We're considering...considering....OMG I don't know if I can resist.

The future of censorship on FaceBook

Doesn't take a brain surgeon to figure out why FB likely disabled my account. This blog interfaces with FB and all the naughty stuff you see here shows up on my page there. Full front nudity violates their TOS.

No way of knowing if FB will restore my account. Probably not. I just wrote an email directly to Mike Zuckerberg at his FB account asking him about the future of censorship on FaceBook.

I've been banned dozens of times in my career as sex writer and sadomasochist. I've experienced bizarre explosions of prejudice, have had people play some nasty tricks on me over the lifestyle, and been censored or banned on almost all the services that went corporate. The more corporate, the less likely they will tolerate my opinions, my shameless admiration for erotica, my candor about all things sexual.

On Compuserve in the late 1980s, my support group's data library kept getting spontaneously "purged" by corporate. They didn't like our BDSM stories (this was before you could upload images!) In fact, they didn't like us. HQ routinely complained to my boss (who fought loyally for us) about "that pervert, Gloria Brame." My website, gloriabrame.com, was greeted with hostility by all the corporate ISPs back in the 90s when I founded it, and when the small one which finally agreed to host us was bought up by a big corporation, I was promptly kicked off.

Dozens of editors have rejected my work (and in one case, fired me) because of my outspoken positions on liberalizing sexuality in America. DOMINA was rejected by several vanity presses (!!) in the day because it was too hardcore; a literary novel I'd written which had some mild SM content was accepted, then rejected by a "hip little press" because, as the editor explained, "I asked myself last night, if I die tomorrow and this was the last book I published, do I want that book to have sadomasochism in it? And the answer was no."

Joseph Brodsky, the Nobel Laureate poet and my teacher one semester, once told me to tear up a poem I'd written: its sexual themes completely freaked him out. When DifLove was published, suffice to say that mainstream meda's response (as related by the long-suffering publicist assigned to the book at Random House) was mocking and angry. By then, though, we'd been through the experience of Random House lawyers sending us a 14 page FAX detailing everything that freaked them out in the book, prompting our agent to comment, "They don't even do this to books advocating the overthrow of the government!"

Precisely. I've never written a book about how to build a bomb. Never incited anyone to violence. Never encouraged anyone to lie, cheat, or steal, much less overthrow the government. I just talk about sex. Sex: the most dangerous, controversial subject in human history.

FaceBook is going to have to decide whether it's going to be another AOL (yet another service which ultimately shut down the BDSM chats and a weekly conference I ran there), and pretend to be above all that, even as it promotes every possible form of social sleaze, from fake diets and pills to malicious celebrity gossip? If they haven't already, they are going to have to establish a broader policy on censorship than simply "no naughty images allowed." There are naughty images all over FaceBook and links to all manner of explicit content: are they going to continue to randomly ban people? Will they ban everyone? Or will they, as I would've appreciated, flag an account to explain WHY they are disabling you, and steps you may take to fix the problem.

By the way, in other censorship news: Cleo Dubois informs me that youtube banned her new video about the Academy of SM Arts, and said that Two Knotty Boys had videos disabled by management as well.

Is there something in the air or are these just coincidences? Are people running around the Web and complaining about kinksters? As Kissinger once famously said, "Even paranoids have enemies."

My final FaceBook status update declared "I'm Free! Free!"

You don't suppose that FaceBook like some ancient trickster god, decided to play a good joke on me and give me more freedom than I bargained for?

Now that I'm banned from FaceBook -- and one source tells me it's like the Stalin regime, once you're banned, you are a non-person! or maybe that's an ex-parrot! or maybe I should get back to my point! -- I'm making new plans.

I Be Banned (Temporarily, I hope)

Page Not Found | Facebook is the message I got when I tried to log into my FB account tonight, followed by some info that FB had disabled my account. Presumably they are not as comfortable with my blog content as I'd thought. Hm. I've sent them an email in hopes of successfully appealing their decision. I'll keep you updated on whether they allow me back.

I'd probably be more freaked out about this if I hadn't been censored and banned so many times in my writing career -- and always, of course, for the same thing: complete candor about sex and sadomasochism. Will and I were once banned from doing a book-signing during Banned Books Week at an Atlanta Borders. The store manager thought Different Loving would be a perfect book to feature during Banned Books Week as an example of how much more enlightened publishing had become. The suits at Borders HQ however feared that it would appear they were "endorsing" our kind of sexuality if the authors were hosted. They didn't ban the book -- they sold many copies for us, in fact. They just banned the authors.

So I've come to accept that when you're controversial, and your content doesn't conform to vanilla expectations, or when you piss people off by the way you think, shit happens. I really enjoy FB so I will try and work with them. If they've decided I'm just too far off the hook for them, that's okay. There are worse things in life than being forced to spend more time having sex than writing about it.

More when I know something.

My thrustathon, myself

Vanity-searched myself a few weeks ago to see if I'd said anything recently. Turns out I said a whole bunch of things in a language that sort of resembles English but isn't. I'm guessing they lifted something from Cosmo or Men's Health in another language, and fed it into the world's worst web-based English translator. I don't think I've used the word "Negro" in about 20 years. And Lord knows, it's been at least 30 since I schoolworked one for nooky. WHAT?!

No, they don’t meet poverty a thrustathon. Men lust lots of pre-sex combing and tantalizing too.

It haw verify lowercase more than a seek to schoolwork your Negro for nooky, but intend this: If you spend time engaging in preplay, you’ll pave the artefact for more feeling than ever. “When a Negro is overturned on before stimulate in the correct way, it not exclusive feels good, but his embody is also more acceptant and his orgasm more intense,” says stimulate proficient Gloria Brame, PhD. Here, five foreplay-for-him maneuvers that’ll tantalize your guy.

via www.womenloveguide.com

Blog-Topical Books

From now through the holidays, I'll include a list of all the blog-related books I've recommended for the week as gift ideas.

Here's what I've recommended for the last week of November 2009:

Post-Industrial Barbiedollatry

Religious people believe that an infallible God made everyone.  At the same time, they rail against people who weren't made the way they were made.  If God creates every human, and does everything for a reason, why do religious people get so irrational about those God created to be gay, lesbian, kinky, trans or bi?  If they believe in an all-powerful God, why do they reject His variations? 

I think attitudes towards human differences and variations were fundamentally different before industrialization.  Industrialization created a new phenomenon: the ability to reproduce things that were identical down to the last detail.  When all products depended on individuals to hand-craft them, variation was the norm.  Just as no two quality Persian rugs will ever be identical -- because normal human labor inevitably produces variations in stitchings -- pre-industrialized products were expected to show nominal variations, even when carved by the same carpenter using all the same tools and materials.

Nowadays, factories and manufacturing devices are only as good as their ability to eliminate variations from products.  We all want the exact features, working the exact same way, as the next person gets.  We want predictability, because it is the best guarantee of reliability.  It satisfies our competitive urge; it makes us feel equal.  There's nothing wrong with those feelings either.

But somewhere along the way the whole notion of variations as a natural part of life was misplaced.  In 1790 when a little girl received a doll, its facial expression, clothing, and other aspects were likely one-of-a-kind, even if the doll was professionally made in a factory which created numerous examples of a specific model.   Today, if you give a kid a doll whose features are different from her friends' Barbies, you can expect to hear her bawl that it isn't good enough or it isn't REAL.  We have all come to believe that there are states of perfection to which all things must adhere in order to be "real."  We pay higher and higher prices for the privilege of owning that parcel of reality.  In the end, what we are really paying for is the illusion that we are exactly like other people, because we have all the same products they have.

Has this psycho-social transition affected more than economics but even the belief systems of the religious?  Have they bought so far into industrialized society that they see people as widgets, with God the foreman, consistently disappointed that His identical creatures go to hell the minute they're outside the factory door?

Penises everywhere, growing like weeds

I can't endorse the Natural Penis Enlargement Exercise Guide because I've never tried the exercises myself. If you have a penis and would like to give these methods a whirl -- or a twist or a stroke or...or... -- please (oh please) feel free to share your results with me. I'd love to know if they are effective, for more reasons than you can shake a whip at.

What prompted me to share the link was a sudden inspiration as I browsed the testimonials. One gets the sense that throughout the world, in the privacy of their homes, millions of men are earnestly trying to make their penises grow. Hour after hour, day after day, year after year, no doubt billions of men throughout the history of the world have tried one method after another to coerce that simultaneously much-maligned and over-glorified organ into sprouting extra length and girth.  I can almost hear the universal stroking choir chanting, "Come on, buddy, you can do it.  Yes you can!"  As a dominatrix with a sadistic sense of humor, all I can say is, may I watch?

Penises do not "grow."  The only proven method to change natural size is surgery.  Unfortunately, a high percentage of men who undergo the surgery are dissatisfied with the results; and a small percent age end up suing because their penis never works as well afterwards.  That said, unknown to most, men can develop their penile potential far beyond where they are now.  Quack cures (pills, lotions, potions, and devices) aside, there are safe, sane and SMART things men can do to improve the appearance, health and endurance of their penis.  For one example, kegels for men = better muscle strength =  better, firmer erections.  

If you're serious about taking care of your body, then get serious about taking care of your penis.  I  recommend you get a copy of  Exercising The Penis: How To Make Your Most Prized Organ Bigger, Harder & Healthier.  It may not turn you into Johnny Wad but it will definitely help you to be the best man YOU can be. And that, my wishfully-thinking penised-people, is what sexual pleasure is all about.